melaus

Money is important in modern society for superficial stuff − paying bills, satisfying desires, buying a nice house… But, it means nothing, really.

I was quite shocked when you didn’t even know whether I am doing 4 or 3 A2 subjects, nor what they are. This might be a triumph to independence and freedom that most kids always dream to have, as these are personal affairs that no one else should know. Well, I don’t see it that way. If it was me the only one knowing what I am doing, that means I have been a failed person, as I had my family abandoned me.

Then, another sudden shock came when I had a “fyi” email that I saw a line you wrote saying that you were frustrated that I can’t even get into university. Despite the fact that I got 4 university offers so far, including the Imperial College one, and have not been doing too shabby in examinations, it still makes you feel so frustrated. I really don’t know what to say. I am not a genius and I cannot score perfect marks in examinations. I am just a normal person who study for examinations. I don’t know what more I can do to show that I have the ability. Maybe the best way proof is to get into the best university that I have been offered a place, but that means nothing as you did not have confidence nor being supportive during the course… This strikes me the most.

I never blame anyone but myself. Maybe it was me who didn’t reveal my AS results in the most detailed way that made a bad impression on how I have been doing so far; maybe it was me who didn’t do well in CE that made you feel like that; maybe it was me who could not get into SJC after my poor results at SJPS; maybe it was me who likes singing so much that it made an impression on you that I cannot strike a balance between singing and studying… Whatever.

I know earning money to pay my tuition fee is stressful and a lot of hard work, and I am forever grateful and feeling lucky that I have been given so much opportunity, especially that I can go study abroad. I just expect a little bit of support and confidence from you. Just allow me to expect a tiny bit more, just a tiny little bit more…



AL